Secrets for Success in Meeting her Parents
There is nothing as stressful and intimidating as having to meet the parents of your girlfriend for the first time. But, if you know how to handle this, you will see that can be a real interesting experience.
It comes a day in your life when you figure out that your relationship with your girlfriend is getting serious and she has to take you to meet her parents and family. This is a big step in your relationship and it is very important to make a good impression from the beginning, if you want that they agree to meet their girl anymore.
There are several occasions in which you can meet her parents, such as a holiday or birthday, picking her up for a date, or just a dinner in family prepared special for the meeting. No matter in which circumstances you meet, for impressing her parents you must be prepared.
First of all, dress to impress. You must be presentable at your meeting, that's why the best to wear is probably a suit. Your performance will be judged by the first impression you make in their eyes.
Before the big meeting make sure to find out from your girlfriend all the details about her family, so you will know what to talk with them. Ask where her parents work, about their personality if they are very serious or they have sense of humor, and if they like funny people or much reserved, to know how to act with them. It is important to know some details, to not refer to her grandparents if you don't know if they are still alive.
Also asking questions about her family will show her that you really care, that you are interested, and ready to do all the sacrifices that are necessary to make their parents like you. Remember that in the first meeting you must make sure that they observe your good manners, to prove her parents that you deserve to be with their daughter.
If the meeting takes place at their home, don’t forget to bring a gift, such as flowers, a box of chocolate or a bottle of wine to show that you are polite. Be confident, give her father a firm handshake, and as a sign of respect call him Sir.
You have to make a good conversation, but also be prepared for many questions towards your family. Don't panic, relax and look in them eyes and answer as nicely as you can. Be prepared to answer at the question about what do you want to do in the future. Speak about your job, family, sports, but don't bring any discussion about money, politics or personal questions. Asking questions about their family will show your interest about them, as far as your aim is to get along with both partners, to get on their good sides.
Keep a smiled face to show you are friendly; be personable, polite and respectful. Flatters her mother's look or clothing and compliment her cooking by finishing your plate. You may offer your help to clean up the dishes; this will certainly impress her mother.
Be yourself, to see from the beginning how you are, and don't show too much affection towards your girlfriend in their presence, one kiss is enough, to not think her parents that you are over reacting.
Before you leave tell her parents that it was a pleasure meeting them and they have a very special daughter.
You will see that it will be harder with her father which wouldn’t accept easy that now it is another man in his daughter life except him, but if you conquered her mother you will see that she will be the one which will invite you for dinner and will defend you in front of her husband if she really likes you.
So, meeting her parents can't be so bad, and if you really success with this meeting it will base a great friendship between you, which will have a big positive effect on your relationship.
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Christian Divorce. What to Do When It Happens To You Part 2
Part one of "Christian Divorce" that I wrote got a tremendous number of reads so I thought perhaps I should expound a little further. As I said before I want to encourage all believers out there that are going through the pain and darkness of divorce. Having gone through divorce myself there are a few things I can share here from my experience that I hope are helpful.
1) You May Need To Change Your Circle Of Friends Or Even Churches
One of the big things you are going to find out is the church is mostly confused on how to handle the divorce hot potato. When I say the church I am talking about the circle of believers that are supposed to be there for you when hardship comes in your life. You are about to find out most of your friends won't be there for you.
If you can find anyone that you can lean on in this time you are truly blessed. Sadly we like to shoot the wounded and avoid anything that may be awkward. If you are the innocent party in your divorce, and even if everybody in your church knows that, don't expect anyone to treat you with grace and not judge you unjustly. Chances are they will remove you from ministry of any kind until this thing " blows over" which may be years before it is resolved.
It will be hard finding a church that understands that your righteousness is only because of what Jesus did and not some holiness badge you earned that the church gives out. Somehow you have to qualify by your good works to be in ministry or hold any position in the church where people see you. Now if you do have a good church that is totally mature I stand corrected and by all means stay there and reach out. It is just that It has been my experience that they are hard to find.
Meanwhile they have painted you with the divorce brush even though you may be the innocent party. In any case if this is your scenario it is probably best to consider changing churches or even take a break for awhile. That way nobody can put any flaky judgments on you. There is a big difference between church doctrine and how Jesus handles this situation.
2) Learn to Pray and Hear God Daily
The best thing you can do right now is set aside time daily to cast all your care on Jesus. The more you pray the more you can speed the healing process. I guarantee you God is totally close to you with comfort and counsel to give you hope without any condemnation. Listen closely in your spirit and he will talk to you in your prayer time.
All those court issues need not have power over you to keep you awake at night if you are standing on the side of righteousness. God upholds his word and he will fight for you in court. It will turn your way if your spouse has lied and been less than Christian about certain things.
This is a good time to listen for God's voice as he will guide you and speak to the things you are feeling deeply wounded about. The many hours I spent in prayer brought me revelation of the things I felt cheated by and gave me new perspective. Work out forgiveness towards your spouse. Time doesn't heal all wounds, you and Jesus do. As a friend told me at the time " life does get better" so hang in there.
Most importantly of all find and confess scriptures that bring you hope. You need to confess God's word to your circumstance and not your feelings. Do this out loud in your prayer time. " The young lions do hunger and suffer lack but they that seek the Lord lack no good thing " was one of my favorites but there are lots more that are just as good.
Make Jesus your closest friend because he does have the answers. Remember God is walking through this divorce with you and he is wanting to unfold plan B seeing how plan A didn't pan out. Your comments are welcome. God bless you.
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